I have tears streaming from my eyes. I am upset because this world isn't small enough. Why do we aspire to living in different countries across vast oceans? Why can we all not live in one little village, with everyone living a few minutes walk away? Yes we have airplanes to take us places, yes we have video phones to allow better communication, but there is nothing like sitting with your family, sharing a meal or a joke or just sitting there with one person reading a paper, the second sipping tea and the third declaring they can see a cat lounging on a branch from the window and then drifting off into a cat related dialogue.
I know I can always visit and talk over the phone and see them over the camera. A few years back I wanted to see the world and travel. Now, I want to stay at home.
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
Thursday, 26 November 2009
The honeymoon is over
The honeymoon is well and truly over. It was over a long time ago, however I do sometimes wonder if it was ever there.
So many things have been said and so many things have not been done that they make me wonder, why on earth do people get married.
I am writing this possibly because I am in a quandry. What do I want more, being able to do things the way I think is best for concerned parties whilst being objective or follow the heart and let it take me where I might find a momentary holiday. Why momentary? Well, you can only enjoy not doing things for so long. How long can someone stand being the housemaker. Sure there are many things to keep the mind occupied. However it is still daunting to think that I might have to sit at home for a year or more before I get a job I might enjoy. I won't be able to update the facade of things contaminated without asking for permission, it is not neutral ground, as someone quit clearly stated, it is their turf.
On an offshoot, some people just don't understand which adjectives actually describe them. Practical, I don't think so. More like, unnecessarily, a clean freak. Caring, yeah right. Easy going, I certainly don't think so. And worst of all, nice. Do not call yourself nice, because you probably aren't nice if you feel the need to say that about yourself.
Do I care enough to lose what I have? People say, you either marry for love, money or something which will help you make a better life.
Get real, love doesn't give you anything, it is a momentary fuzzy feeling that comes and goes. For me the disappearance of that feeling was catalysed by the fact that some conspired to try and make me live like a fool. Too bad that didn't work out. I still get so angry when I think about it.
Anywho, I landed back on lovely earth pretty quickly and found myself wondering what the hell have I got myself into. I am trying to get to the root cause, it is this an ego issue, monetary issue or a feasibility issue?
So, where does the honeymoon come into all of this. Well, I am not thinking w.r.t. love anymore.
So many things have been said and so many things have not been done that they make me wonder, why on earth do people get married.
I am writing this possibly because I am in a quandry. What do I want more, being able to do things the way I think is best for concerned parties whilst being objective or follow the heart and let it take me where I might find a momentary holiday. Why momentary? Well, you can only enjoy not doing things for so long. How long can someone stand being the housemaker. Sure there are many things to keep the mind occupied. However it is still daunting to think that I might have to sit at home for a year or more before I get a job I might enjoy. I won't be able to update the facade of things contaminated without asking for permission, it is not neutral ground, as someone quit clearly stated, it is their turf.
On an offshoot, some people just don't understand which adjectives actually describe them. Practical, I don't think so. More like, unnecessarily, a clean freak. Caring, yeah right. Easy going, I certainly don't think so. And worst of all, nice. Do not call yourself nice, because you probably aren't nice if you feel the need to say that about yourself.
Do I care enough to lose what I have? People say, you either marry for love, money or something which will help you make a better life.
Get real, love doesn't give you anything, it is a momentary fuzzy feeling that comes and goes. For me the disappearance of that feeling was catalysed by the fact that some conspired to try and make me live like a fool. Too bad that didn't work out. I still get so angry when I think about it.
Anywho, I landed back on lovely earth pretty quickly and found myself wondering what the hell have I got myself into. I am trying to get to the root cause, it is this an ego issue, monetary issue or a feasibility issue?
So, where does the honeymoon come into all of this. Well, I am not thinking w.r.t. love anymore.
Monday, 3 August 2009
A sign of things to come
The person laughed when I declared that my blog was called 'The cosmos is within me and I am within it' and called it cheesy. Well call it what you like, I enjoy writing and I feel the title fits in with what I wish to convey.
Why was this a sign of things to come? Being laughed at first and then being taken seriously is quite the norm now. Ha ha, you really think that; oh by the way do you know (with the original supposedly laughable statement being repeated as fact). I don't care really, afterall I shall do what I get joy out of. But one does wonder, whether the other person understands the depths and the thought process behind certain actions and way of thinking. Perhaps, it is too taxing to go into detail and think about the rationale of a thought.
I suppose I should feel pleased about the fact that I bring a feeling of not having to apply yourself too much, or that one does not need to make the effort. But then again, why should it be such an effort? I suppose that is a sign of taking things for granted. When you have something, you don't clean it as much or you don't give it much thought thinking that it is with you and it is going nowhere. However, you might be guilty of allowing it to degrade or not letting it glow in its glory or sharing something that it is good at.
I shall keep an open mind. If I am laughed at, so be it, it is you who shall be missing out.
Why was this a sign of things to come? Being laughed at first and then being taken seriously is quite the norm now. Ha ha, you really think that; oh by the way do you know (with the original supposedly laughable statement being repeated as fact). I don't care really, afterall I shall do what I get joy out of. But one does wonder, whether the other person understands the depths and the thought process behind certain actions and way of thinking. Perhaps, it is too taxing to go into detail and think about the rationale of a thought.
I suppose I should feel pleased about the fact that I bring a feeling of not having to apply yourself too much, or that one does not need to make the effort. But then again, why should it be such an effort? I suppose that is a sign of taking things for granted. When you have something, you don't clean it as much or you don't give it much thought thinking that it is with you and it is going nowhere. However, you might be guilty of allowing it to degrade or not letting it glow in its glory or sharing something that it is good at.
I shall keep an open mind. If I am laughed at, so be it, it is you who shall be missing out.
Saturday, 25 July 2009
Note to self
Change the day you were born, so that it doesn't pain you too much to think that after you are called, 15 days later, within the same month, the same phonecall is made, but to someone else.
Absurd, well, so be it.
Absurd, well, so be it.
Tears
Why do you cry?
Because you are happy?
or are you sad?
Did someone make you see sense?
or did someone not let you see the mess?
Are you overjoyed by the accomplishments?
Or by the transformation?
You hardly cried before; now you shed tears everyday.
For multiple reasons, how things have changed, how life has shifted.
Because you are happy?
or are you sad?
Did someone make you see sense?
or did someone not let you see the mess?
Are you overjoyed by the accomplishments?
Or by the transformation?
You hardly cried before; now you shed tears everyday.
For multiple reasons, how things have changed, how life has shifted.
Wednesday, 13 May 2009
Anything is possible
Anything is possible. And never say never. Two synonymous statements.
Anything is possible. Fulfilling a dream of being successful in the world of finance; be able to help society by working with children; finding someone who ticks all the right boxes.
You can do what you want and get what you want, but you have to work hard and well. Being a hard worker doesn't quite do the job, its about how smart you can work too; how resourceful you can be, apply fore and hindsight to increase your chances of success whilst decreasing the time it takes to attain it.
People have various ways of attaining what they wish for. Integrity and ambition are perhaps the two aspects that can drive one to achieve ones goals. You don't have to be 'intelligent', as long as common sense prevails, one can use the resources around you to work with you and for you. Intelligence is such a subjective term. What is intelligence, having the ability to score well in IQ tests or the ability to take in information, process it such that a valuable result is produced?
There is a flip side of the 'anything is possible; too. For the pessimist too, anything is possible, it is possible that you will fail, lose everything you have and not recover or not be able to support the people you need to. There is no limit to the direction in which you can take 'anything is possible'.
You can go up and reach a ceiling; you can go down and hit the bottom or you can go side ways and hit a wall.
Or, you can go up and reach the stars, you can go down and hit the sea bed or travel laterally and never find an obstacle.
Perception, how you percieve a situation has a great impact on the process, the result and its after effects.
Are you born with how you percieve things, or can you be taught to look at the world a certain way? I think you are born with a certain slant with which one sees the world, however I do believe that with the right mindset and environment, the human brain is wired to relearn many things and build a new set of schemas.
Treat the mind gently, and it is possible to teach yourself anything.
Anything is possible. Fulfilling a dream of being successful in the world of finance; be able to help society by working with children; finding someone who ticks all the right boxes.
You can do what you want and get what you want, but you have to work hard and well. Being a hard worker doesn't quite do the job, its about how smart you can work too; how resourceful you can be, apply fore and hindsight to increase your chances of success whilst decreasing the time it takes to attain it.
People have various ways of attaining what they wish for. Integrity and ambition are perhaps the two aspects that can drive one to achieve ones goals. You don't have to be 'intelligent', as long as common sense prevails, one can use the resources around you to work with you and for you. Intelligence is such a subjective term. What is intelligence, having the ability to score well in IQ tests or the ability to take in information, process it such that a valuable result is produced?
There is a flip side of the 'anything is possible; too. For the pessimist too, anything is possible, it is possible that you will fail, lose everything you have and not recover or not be able to support the people you need to. There is no limit to the direction in which you can take 'anything is possible'.
You can go up and reach a ceiling; you can go down and hit the bottom or you can go side ways and hit a wall.
Or, you can go up and reach the stars, you can go down and hit the sea bed or travel laterally and never find an obstacle.
Perception, how you percieve a situation has a great impact on the process, the result and its after effects.
Are you born with how you percieve things, or can you be taught to look at the world a certain way? I think you are born with a certain slant with which one sees the world, however I do believe that with the right mindset and environment, the human brain is wired to relearn many things and build a new set of schemas.
Treat the mind gently, and it is possible to teach yourself anything.
Saturday, 9 May 2009
Distance makes the heart grow fonder
Roughly 5456 miles, the north Atlantic ocean separating the two land masses.
Modern technology allows you to speak and see your loved ones like never before. You can show off the trousers that you bought, you can advise the man on the colour of their tie or tell them off if their room is untidy.
It is such a comfort to hear their voice and see them smile, frown or get angry. However, nothing can replace having someone in front of you; peck them on the cheek or pinch them on their arm.
It's the small things that you miss when apart; waking someone up in the morning, hearing the other person drink tea or munch on a snack, hear them sleep, look them in the eye when you tell them something and anticipate a reaction or have them help you choose between two types of potatoes.
The usual and mundane, when absent, become the most missed.
Modern technology allows you to speak and see your loved ones like never before. You can show off the trousers that you bought, you can advise the man on the colour of their tie or tell them off if their room is untidy.
It is such a comfort to hear their voice and see them smile, frown or get angry. However, nothing can replace having someone in front of you; peck them on the cheek or pinch them on their arm.
It's the small things that you miss when apart; waking someone up in the morning, hearing the other person drink tea or munch on a snack, hear them sleep, look them in the eye when you tell them something and anticipate a reaction or have them help you choose between two types of potatoes.
The usual and mundane, when absent, become the most missed.
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